Friday, June 10, 2011

Can I really be bothered?

Its hard to be positive about today in almost any way at all. But that's not to say I'm down or depressed. Just a lot of negativity today has really brought the tone down.
From the word go this morning its been far from great. Over night mum decided she is using the main house toilet, not the one I got her, so on hearing her up at 3am I waited up until she was back in her room. Up again at 7am, she eventually went from the bathroom to out the back for a cigarette, ten mins before the carer arrived.
After warning here the carer would be here shortly, and unable to find her out back, she just stayed there. Some might call what followed childish, I just saw it as a dry run of reality.
The carer knocked and let herself in at 8, calling for mum as she entered the house. Over the next 10-15 mins she looked in the areas of the house she can access, and called mum, ringing the bell etc. Eventually after 20 mins I got a call from the agency to ask if mum was in hospital or something. So I let the carer back in and showed her to mum.

This all sounds petty I know, but the idea of splitting the house was to make the house suitable for mum, and accessible for the carers while I am out. Keeping them safe from the dogs. But mum has decided to keep asking the carers to take her to the proper bathroom, or out the back, which cannot happen once I'm back to full hours. Hence trying to get her used to it now. Its not working!

Once that was sorted, I went to work, and started trying to arrange the district nurse to sort mums mattress. The end result of that is they are coming out on Monday to assess the situation, and see if they need to order a new style of mattress. This is going to mean a day off work, as they can't give me a time, which kinda sucks, as I'm trying to increase my presence, not decrease.

On coming home, making myself and the dogs dinner, the final carer of the day arrived. Low and behold, as soon as I start to get tucked in, mum calls. She wants Tuvaaq stopped from eating his dinner, and put outside so she can go to the loo. Still refusing to use the loo in her room. This is where it gets risky, because she just keeps opening the door. If the carer feels threatened by seeing the dog, that could be the end of that. And more to the point, on full hours I would be at work still, so what would happen then?

Its all frustrating as hell, but something tells me its only gonna get worse for the time being. I might start drink or drug abuse at some point soon.

On another note, just to time stamp it, my foot os hurting like hell. Has been for a week now. Feels almost like gout, but don't see what the trigger could have been, and the usual cures are not working. Watch this space!

Final note, hope your exams are going well Sian :) x

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