Week 6 - The Wall

I was bound to arrive at it at some point, but its been so long since I hit one, that I forgot how big they can be. I am of course talking about the wall as a metaphor, and am not suddenly shocked to find a wall outside my house.

Somewhere along the line in any training program or routine you will come across the obstacle in your path. For some its a branch to hop over, other its a hurdle that just takes a bit of a push. But for some, me inc in this case, its a bloody great brick wall double my height, no ropes, no footings. Now if you have seen Run Fatboy Run, you will be familiar with this metaphor, and the struggle is can be to get past it, if not, you are probably a little confused right now.

Progress on Weeks 1 through to 5 have been without drama. Some aches and pains along the way, a touch of nausea here and there but nothing else. Today however, the start of Week 6 was a different matter. I woke very tired, lacking motivation, slightly upset stomach and nausea. Sensing trouble was ahead I decided there was only one course of action to take. Get some fluids in me, get off my lazy de-motivated arse, and get moving. So that's exactly what I did.

The key was to wake up, get my mind and body up to speed, and get focused on the usual routine. I just wanted to shake it off and carry on. The dog walks went to plan and were not too much of an effort, so I was ready for the P90X part of the morning. Chest Shoulders and Triceps is quite a demanding routine, and drains the last drips of energy from you quickly, so its sods law that was what today had in store for me.

As I got ready my body started to groan, and the first 20 push-ups of the day basically were the school bully, mocking me, throwing things at me, and picking on me. Trying to psych me out, and make me quit. Been there before! Turning it to my advantage I just got angry with the drop in drive, and used that to drive me instead. Pushing harder, using the anger and frustration within me to squeeze out the last few reps in each movement, and to move onwards to the next step. Watching the clock ticking down from 60 mins to the last few seconds.

At the last movement finished, and the cooldown begun, I could almost picture the wall exploding in front of me. Not content with getting over the wall, I had pushed so hard, like I was a bulldozer on tracks, not losing traction or momentum, and push push pushing my way through. Smashing through the wall, destroying it, and hopefully making sure it won't pop up in my way again any time soon. Worst case, next lap I will have some rubble to hop over.

The moral of this story is.. When challenges present themselves. Don't shy away, avoid or find a way around them. Conquer them, overcome them. Once they are defeated you will have new found strength, determination and confidence that NOTHING can stand in your way.

Week 6, Day 2...... I'm waiting for you!
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The past, the present and the future..

I guess that's the three elements of life that we can choose from. Which timezone we should exist in. All are important, all have some baring on our lives, but we can truly only exist in one of them. Which do you choose?

I guess I have tried them all at some point. Living in the past, waiting for things to come back around, wrongs to right themselves, wishes to come true, and situations play out again and again til its in our favour. Carrying the hurt and pain of days gone by, and pretending that things haven't happened. Truth is, the past is the past. The last paragraph you just read has happened and is gone now.
No matter how hard you try, how much you pray, its gone! You can't change it, you can't undo things, and it all now forms part of your life. I tell you what you can do though, learn from it. Like building a wall, the last course of bricks you laid are there now, and the best you can do is use them as a good foundation for the next layer. It might be a little messy, a bit uneven, so improve on it. Learn from it, don't lay the next brick as awkwardly.
Life gives us so many opportunities, even the most successful have missed a few along the way, but that's not a bad thing really. OK so you might have missed something fantastic, but as I say, you can't go back to it. So use it to make your next opportunity and decision count.

Then there is the future. Hopes and dreams are all that is there really. Nothing is certain, nothing predetermined of deserved. Hell if you think that you 'deserve' to be the next lottery winner or other such fates, then you are going to be as disappointed as I was when I thought it was my turn. Setting goals, aiming high, having a dream, nothing wrong with that at all. We all need to set goals somewhere in our lives, to give us a little structure and direction in life.

But once we have the direction, then we must ultimately let life be the pace setter. Of course we can influence things, again our choices count, this isn't a rollercoaster that we have no control over at all. However we have to submit a little control to the Big G, or life, however you choose to call it.

Hell without goals I would be lost, there is no doubt there at all. And right now I would be depressed, overweight and unhealthy. That's just the very tip of the iceberg in my life to say the least.

Then we come to the present. This instant, this moment in time. You chose to continue reading my blog and for that I thank you. This is the point in your life that YOU control. As the sliding doors of life open and close around us, we make snap choices, and then we have our next present moment. Break your life down into each decision you have made today alone and you will be shocked. Choosing to get up or stay in bed, bath or shower, breakfast or skip it, and so on. These are decisions that impact on the next.

Excuse my harshness in this explaination, but stay with me here. Staying in bed, you fell back to sleep, overslept and were woken by the home phone. After the time you should have left for work, but here you are speaking to the old flame that you lost contact with, and she chose out of the blue to call the old number she had for you.

Skip the breakfast you always have. That 2 mins you didn't wait for toast meant you caught the earlier bus, which was in the Russell Square bombing.

You didn't make these decisions with these outcomes in mind, but your choice developed.... They all do, and you can't stop them.

Are you lost yet, trying to see where this is going, what I'm on about. Well allow me...

In short, the only timezone to live in is NOW, make the decisions that are best for us at this precise moment, and don't dwell on what was, or what might happen. Truth is you only control rough direction, not speed, nor destination. Life is an incredible journey. Its not about how long it is, its about how it changed our emotions and the emotions of others. A good life can be 25 years long, and will leave an ever lasting imprint on others.

My outlook on life is quite simple, tomorrow may never come, so why am I planning 10 years from now. I want my decisions and actions to be remembered. I would love for my thoughts and words to impact on others and maybe help them make their next decision. Yesterday happened, its gone, and whatever was lost with it is gone too. But if it was precious, special or important to me, I carry it forward with me. Special things never die, never fade. They remain with us until our final day here as a living being.

So choose wisely. Live your life fully. Embrace every day, don't look back with sadness or anger. We have a beautiful gift of life, each and every one of us. A gift that is taken away in the blink of an eye. So out of respect of those who no longer have theirs, live yours!

I will leave you with my life motto.... One life, one chance, NO regrets.

Choose it, smile about it..... Live it!

PS this was written walking the streets of South London on a beautiful sunny day. Life is beautiful isn't it!

X
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That little pouch at the front.

You know the one I mean, that little pocket of flab that whatever you do, just refuses to go away.
I have been doing P90X for about 5 weeks now, and watching what I ate from long before that, progress is good and things are tightening up. However, I'm at that awkward, annoying, and to some embarrassing stage where the muscles are toning, and starting to show, but here and there, there are pockets of fat that just wanna stay.

My tummy is the main culprit here, with a little flab sack that just won't quit. Now if I'm honest I guess it IS actually slowly disappearing, but now that everything is pulling tight, it seems to notice more. When you are bigger all the fat seems to stick together, but this is like a plastic back with some cottage cheese rolling around in it as the bag swings.

OK, sorry I'm being a little gross here I know, but its actually motivating me to work harder to get rid of it. Reality is though, at my age, it could just decide its there to stay, and I could be blighted by it forever... But its not staying without a fight, and a BIG fight at that. My abdominal exercises are becoming more frequent now, and I am achieving more reps in them now. Knocking out 30-50 sit ups per sitting is easy, and that in one movement alone. Not including side crunches etc which all form part of my impromptu ab's routine.

I did some push-ups last night just to curtail a little excess energy, and they just kept coming, no effort just more and more, perfect form too. I'm reaching that stage now of shocking myself with what I can do.

There is no doubt that Yoga has improved my balance a lot, and I guess the weightloss helps there too, lightening the load on the limbs and joints. Speaking of which, my post training weight today was 215lbs. Which came as quite a shock as I had bread, chocolate and noodles yesterday lol. Imagine how much more I would lose if I was strict on my diet again... Hey, there's an idea.

In the next week of so I will get strict again, but for now its nice to answer cravings, and keep myself busy and active in the meantime.

I have to say at this point, I really love my routine right now, never dreading it, enjoying being up early, loving the energy levels, and feeling so full of beans its unreal. Thank you again P90X. If you are looking for a routine to get active, get toned and flex a little, P90X is the one for sure.

So, you little pocket of fat, prepare yourself cos I'm coming to get you. I have all year to make you disappear, your days are numbered!
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My words of the day

Morning y'all, another day, another workout session. What are you doing today. Any food treats for FriesDay? Another 1lb drops off the scales for me today, and now its time to hit P90X for Legs and Back, oh goody my favorites! Whatever you are doing, make it a positive one, and remember one day at a time = results.
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Is it really Day 30 already?

It sure is! Who would believe it, not only have I endured thirty days of hard training, I have also stayed on track with my food intake. Upping my calories when needed, and the occasional treat here and there. But for the majority of the time I have stayed right on track.
This week I return to the proper high intensity workouts, weights, bands, and Plyometrics just to name a few routines I will be following over the coming three weeks, but I love it! No seriously, I really do love doing it. Pushing myself to my limit, and then beyond. Driving myself to near destruction, and most of all, feeling the rewards for my hard work.

This isnt a work hard, see no results program. This is quite the opposite, with results being felt at the end of every session, and seeing results on an incremental basis. Suddenly realising a muscle group is firming up, finding more strength in an activity, or just feeling how tight you have become. (physical not financial). Triceps, glutes, quads, deltoids, the list is endless of the muscle groups that are reaping the rewards of my body's hard work.

The hardest thing for me right now is coping with the reality that getting my stomach in shape is a BIG job. Underneath all the hoardings the work is sure in progress. My ability to do crunches, leg raises, scissors etc is much improved. If it feel how toned everything is becoming its evident. However on the surface things are not quite as rosey, well not yet anyway. Much reduced, and pulled in tight the difference is obvious, but getting rid of the last pockets of fat, and hoping there is elasticity left in my skin at my ripe old age, well that's a waiting game. However, that said, my determination is strong, and another 60 days are ahead of the P90X program alone, let alone how ever long I want to maintain my diet for. In time, as things progress I can look more at my diet as well as increasing activity to attack the flab. However for now I remain positive about it all, and the stomach toning (not getting a 6 pack) is the last of my worries.

Over all, I am delighted, motivated and excited about the coming SIXTY days ahead of me. What can I achieve, how different can I look, and how much can I increase my fitness by. I am not expecting massive differences in my first 30 day pictures. Maybe a little definition appearing in my arms and legs, and a small reduction around the waistline. Other than that, I don't know, and don't expect much. However I am really looking forwards to seeing the difference by Day 60.

The only problems I have encountered along the way have been absence, as in having to go away for a day, or miss morning training due to an appointment, and the biggest scare was this morning, waking with issues with my Plantar Facsia (muscles/tendons on the bottom of the foot). After a long spell of fast walking last night, I woke this morning with a lot of pain in my right foot, which I have recently had issues with. Fearing I would not be able to walk, let alone train I put some anti inflammatory gel on my foot, relaxed for a bit, then walked the dogs at a steady pace. After an hour of that I was ready to train. Training which just to happened to be Plyometrics (jump training). However it would appear the worry was over nothing, and I flew through my training with no ill effect. I might however be paying for it in the morning.

So, for now I guess that's me, well on P90X it is. Im sure I have more to say, but I will save that for the bath later lol.

So here is to everyone out there working hard on their training programs, diets, and other keep fit regimes. The gains are there to be made, you just need to knuckle down and commit. A little motivation is needed, and an element of willpower, but it is in all of us. Competing against friends, setting goals, or just having the desire to feel better about yourself. Whatever your motivation, keep at it, and lets get results together.

Noel, Baljit, Laura, Ivan, Clare, and everyone else ................. come on!! Race you to the finish!

Week 4 over, P90X kicks ass!

Wow, so that's 4 weeks of P90X actually finished. 9 more to go, so its far from over, but after the first four, I am even more motivated than I was at the start. I don't know exact figures so won't preach too much here, but I do know that including using my extreme diet, I have dropped in excess of 30lbs now. (Diet started before P90X, so 15-20 is down to P90X)

So where do I start? Cor, tough one. Well as you prob know I started doing the program due to a friend, Noel. He mentioned this and Insanity and I was hooked. Had I gone the Insanity route I think I would have quit by now as its not what I was looking for. P90X however offered me structure, discipline and direction. As well as variation, which is important to me as I get bored and lose motivation quite quickly at times.

P90X has given me a new start so to speak. Woken up parts of my body and mind that have slept for way too long, and reintroduced me to my passion for feeling so alive and invigorated. Training isn't painless, its not without sensation and discomfort. Hell if it is, you ain't doing it right! But with the aches come gains, with the strain comes reward. By the end of a good workout, and a little time to recover you should feel great.

I have grown used to sleeping solid all night now, waking refreshed and with the drive to get up as soon as I wake and get the say started. Walking the dogs in the rain is no big thing, as I get warmed up, and then I get to train. Mentality is similar to the dogs, they walk and get fed, I walk and get to train. Win-win or what!

The toughest part for me so far has been to get nutrition right. I'm broke, let's be honest here, so getting my intake good enough to train at this level has been tough. My staple diet is cereal, with a small intake of protein in fish and chicken, and a few odds and sods when the body actually craves them. The result of this somewhat poor intake has been amazing. Weightloss, gains in stamina and endurance, and enough energy to not only carry me though a workout, but also onwards for the rest of the day. I'm not advocating poor diet here, but I'm alive and kickin like a wild bull!

My biggest discovery has to be my love for yoga, or should I say Yoga X. Relaxing, stretching, balancing and sweating like crazy. The balance between energising the body and pushing the limits of the body is perfection, and after 90 mins of fighting for excellence, including Yoga Belly X, I could just sleep. Not through exhaustion, but total relaxation of the body and mind. I have entered new territories of flexibly, shocked myself with balance, but most of all I have congratulated myself for committing and achieving so much on this one routine.

As for the rest of P90X, what can I tell you. Its a great program, I can say that already at this stage, simply because it DOES get results, and it has me hooked. I live to train, while I train to live. And to me that is a great ethos. Not to some I realise, but I have made use of the time I have daily, to make the most of the time I have in life, period! From cardio to stretching, weights to resistance, the whole package just hits the whole body, hard! But not too hard. As much as you might ache the next day, you can be sure that the next step in the program is achievable, maybe with a hint of discomfort.

In the past few days I have had some strong cravings for foods, junk mainly, but specific areas, being protein and sugars. Both are scarce in my daily diet, so I answer the cravings in moderation, while keeping the end goal in mind. The end goal that is Fit4Forty, or fit by my next birthday for the better explanation. For years now I have been fascinated by guys who maintain physical conditioning to that age, or achieve it late. I am currently having my second wind in life, and need to be fitter, healthier and more flexible to achieve my goals. So here I am on this journey.

In reality, while the program is 90 days, I have til next Feb to get to where I want to be, and I am determined to keep pushing and hopefully even surprise myself with the end result. For now, there is muscle growth, fat loss, definition (appearing anyway), endurance and drive. Simple targets like increasing push-ups, crunches, leg raises etc, are shocking me. I am not into hundreds, but the increase in ability and form builds almost daily.

I could keep going on for ages about P90X but will leave it there for now. But in the meantime I want to say this.
I know this blog, the Twitter account @therealslimsnaz and updates on Facebook have bored some people, but I also know for a fact they have interested and even inspired others, and that's what this blog is all about. Inspiration, and assistance in YOUR life, by taking something from mine and running with it (life mugging maybe?). My main outlook in life for years now has been to look after other people, and share my experiences in the hope that one will help someone else in a time of trouble or need. So please feel free to share your feedback with me in any way you see fit.

Thank you for reading this, and I hope you have learned something from it, even if its never to click my blog link again lol.
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Letting go.

Its never an easy thing to do, everyone says you need to, everyone wants to tell you how to, but errrm, why?
Well in reality, at least in mine, I think its true. The only way you can get on with your life and have a worthwhile existence is to let go of the past and move on. But before I get going, or piss anyone off, let me explain.

No-one said letting go means to forget about things, and act like they never happened. If you think about it we do it over and over in life, without even thinking about it. Its just that some things take a little more effort to let go of. We leave school, change jobs, move away, etc. Every time we let a part of our life escape our grasps. No longer can we make more memories with that thing or person, no more can we interact, but is that the end of the world, or just a chance to continue on a slightly different path.

I guess a couple of factors control how we cope, and how we go about moving on. Firstly, who's decision was it. Did we have control of the situation, or was it just removed from our grasps without us having a say in the matter. The latter always sucks, and is pretty hard to accept. Its human nature to want to be in control. We feel safe like that, and there is accountability and blame easily found when we have control.

The second factor which will determine how we cope is 'what'. What this thing or person meant to us, and how integrated into our lives it has become. For close friends and loved ones this pushes our coping mechanism to its limits. Having lost a few good friends and my mother in the space of about 18 months I have become quite accustomed to my own way of letting go, but for others its not so simple.

Each of us will battle with the breakup of a relationship, the loss of a loved one, or anything as intimate as this in our own way. Be it through sadness and grief, or happiness and celebration (sounds weird but bare with me here.), the most important thing is that we DO IT!

For me, when John Littlebury passed away it was a bit of a shock. We had spoken only a week before for the first time in ages, we had spoken about a multitude of things including our long friendship, and that mattered. On hearing he had passed, while I was so far away from home, my first worry was the family. I was miles away, what if they needed me. My first words were 'the stupid sod'.
When I sat down and thought about it all, I wondered why I was not grieving, struck down with emotion, and was I in the wrong for not feeling anything more. But it made sense, we were at peace, and even after he is gone I have a head FULL of such amazing memories of being with John, seeing him settle down, his family grow, and the crazy things we had done over the years. They will never leave me, and whenever I think of John, I think of happiness, and the good times.
Just like a friend at school that I don't see anymore, we shared a period of our lives together, and I will always know I was blessed to have spent time with him.

Since then, as more have passed, including mum, I have followed the same process. Facing the reality of the loss, then reflecting on my memories with that person, then getting on with my life the way I know they would have wanted me to.

I said celebrate earlier, and this is why. For some reason when I go to a funeral, as I see the coffin sitting there, I get the very vivid picture that my friend or loved one is laying there, at peace, in no pain, and this is my chance to say goodbye. I don't know if there is an afterlife, if spirits are real, if we can really affect others with our thoughts and emotions, but if you can, then I want to send out warmth, love and happiness to the person I am letting go. A flood of memories fill my mind, and a warm feeling surges through me, almost like a vault of happy memories has been re-opened, and I can now re-live the memories over and over again. A smile will spread across my face, and I will for a moment feel at one, and at peace with the person. Our last seconds together should be happy, not sad.

For me, as I say it might be easy, or at least seem that way. I know for others the process is far longer and harder. But my message is to remind you that the love shared between to souls was and forever will be a two way thing. As we would never wish sadness on them, they would never want us to be sad, even in the wake of the loss of them. Take a second to think how YOU would want others to feel if you passed tomorrow. I can say without no doubt that I would not want a sad occasion, and would simply want people to have happy and full lives, with or without me.

However you deal with the loss of a loved one, remember that quite bluntly, life goes on. To cope with our day to day lives, to carry on being there for others and being ourselves we need to find a way to let go, but just of their physical existence. They will never leave your side, they will never wish you sadness, and the moments we shared will live on for an eternity.

I hope that some of this makes sense.

Today I let go of another friend. My release of him will be easier than many, but I promise not without sorrow. Farewell Darren Green, may your memories live on forever.

X
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Introducing the iPad NANO!

Nevermind the iPad or the iPad2, forget the 'new iPad' or iPadHD as its been called.. its all about the iPad Nano.

Yes, you read it here first, it slipped under the radar on launch day, but its here and its real.  

Watch the review here.

Thanks to SlurpyJ aka Chris Cohen for this amazing insight into Apple, iPad Nano, and the Applati

Gutted... Thank heavens that's over with!

One of those strange things has just happened, one of those, 'I want this so bad' moments, but when it doesn't materialise somehow its not that bad either.

Anyone who knows me well will know what this is about, anyone who doesn't will simply be able to relate to the whole general situation.

When you work towards something so hard that it becomes a part of your day to day life, and everything starts to revolve around it. Almost to an unhealthy level of obsession. You reach a point that whatever the outcome, its for the best.

I think the word I'm looking for here is closure, or at least completion of a chapter. If it works out, great carry on, onwards and upwards as they say. If not, well then its a weight off your shoulders and somehow a relief that its all over with, at least for now.

Its a strange sensation, to visualise the word 'FAIL' but somehow read it as 'RELIEVED'. Strange, but good I have to say. Right now I feel a great weight has been lifted, and that I can just get on and focus on the more pressing and important things in my life now.
Am I relieved to have not succeeded, not at all, in fact its very disappointing to say the least. I hate not achieving goals I set myself, its one of the few things that really gets to me deep down inside. However on this occasion I can accept it without feeling defeated. I don't consider the matter over with, I shall re address the issue in the coming months, but for now I accept a little defeat, acknowledge that I have much to learn, and that I under estimated what was needed from me, and will just up my game when the time comes to revisit the matter.

For now... Its time to focus on my fitness and health, get my finances in order, and relax a little bit with one less thing to worry and stress about for a while. While I feel disappointed, and that I have let my late mum down a bit, and am sure to get it in the neck from my aunt, I know I gave it my all (in the later stages anyway).

When the moment comes again, I will be ready, prepared and on fire. Determined, informed and motivated to burst through this barrier that has placed itself in front of me. I will not draw weakness from my past experience, and instead will use my lessons from the past to drive me with more determination to my goal. When I do, it will bring change to my life, and those around me.

So, what things have dragged you down to a low point, so far in fact that you were relieved to get it over with, regardless of outcome?

For me, page turns now, and onwards I go.
A bookmark in place, and a page I will return to at some point, soon.
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A quick P90X update....

OK for some this talk of P90X is all getting a bit boring I know. But if that is the case, why did you click this entry, it says what it is in the title haha. Anyway...

What I am blogging to say is that I have reached one of my objectives. Not just a milestone, not just a marker along the way, but I have hit my target weight. Sub 220lbs. Now as I have said before, this is a ceiling I want to put in place for myself, and whatever happens, I want to avoid rising through it again. Its an alarm point that says I am happy at this weight, but anything over means something is going wrong.

For me this is a big day, because it means the weightloss part of the program is completed. I am sure more weightloss will occur over the coming weeks, but that will be through physical exertion rather than carefully planning how to lose the next 1lb. Todays weight was 219.6lbs. I like that!

From here on in its time to push HARD, and really step my game up. And I started doing that this morning. With Week 3 of arms and shoulders feeling a bit easier I decided it was time to put the weight and intensity levels up, and the number of reps down (where needed). The result.... well quite simply that OMG feeling after the workout, and that burn during. In short, it felt flippin great, and so do I now.

Another great thing also happened while I was getting ready for bed last night. My girlfriend said to stop holding my breath, and stomach in. I said im not! She was amazed that the definition is slowly starting to appear now, and that you can actually see whats what around my hips and waist now. I too am shocked, when I was putting my shirt on I realised that it just hangs now (the shirt, not my stomach lol).
As for the rest of me, I feel tighter, much tighter in fact, as well as full of beans and raring to go.

I have about another 12 days before my first progress pictures, (30 day), and another 10 weeks of this program, so I am expecting to surprise even myself. P90X is my #1 focus of attention these days, and everything has to work around it.

So heres to working hard, gaining gradually and staying focused.