Friday, June 3, 2011

A few moments to reflect.

So the past 48 hours have been quite the strain really. Nothing drastic, but a whole lot of little things all at once can really take it out of you.
Yesterday for example, taking the day off work to sort out seeing the doctors at the hospice turned out to be a smart move for more than one reason.
Mainly of course to see the doctors and get the low down on mum was the important part, and I succeeded in doing that. I will come back to that soon.

The day started with good walk with the dogs, then home for a healthy breakfast. All going well so far. Next up, pop to the shops for mums daily paper on the way to the hospice, this is where the cracks started to appear. As I walked in the shop I realised I had not put any change in my pocket, so walked to the cashpoint to get some money... Errm problem, request declined for just ten pounds! This was the sign of trouble. Then on going in the shop they didn't have mums paper. I managed to get a paper for mum using another card, but was left wondering what was wrong with the main account. Stressing all the way to the hospice, I finally remembered after a bit that I could use the PC's there to check my account.

Horror, 2 direct debits I was not expecting to come out til next week were gone, leaving me seriously overdrawn. Panic set in further. The next few hours were spent trying to gather together enough money to balance my account to ensure the payments were honoured. Finally by mid afternoon I managed to get that sorted, and was all squared again. Panic over with.... Almost anyway, but that's another story! Trust me.

So early afternoon I had got a message (finally) from the hospice to say the doctor was able to fit me in mid afternoon, so that gave me something to work towards.

I finally got to the hospice and went straight to see the staff for 'the chat'. The idea of the talk is to get everything out in the open, any concerns and worries addressed, and of course to plan how mum can come back home again.
The conversation started with concerns, so I raised my main one, being that mums original problem of confusion and distress had not been forgotten as it was now hiding away well. I was assured that they felt the confusion was caused by the chest infection they were treating, and they were confident it was unlikely to re occur unless an infection returned.
The add-on to this is the whole issue was her 'fear' of the television, and what it might do to her if she tries to watch it again. Once again they cited the infection as the true cause, and suggested that she should maybe try 30 mins of TV supervised while still at the hospice, so she could build confidence that it would not cause complications for her. She was not too keen on this idea, saying that she felt she was not getting a say in any of these decisions, and like her opinions didn't count. So we left that part there.
After this part she got a little defensive and started to almost avoid the conversation, instead choosing to make her own topics to discuss. As we discussed the mattress she needed for home, she rejoined our conversation, saying she just wanted her old foam mattress back. Forgetting all the pain and discomfort of bed sores, in place of an easier life. The idea of this convo was to get rid of the segmented bed that she currently has, and replacing it with a solid air mattress. She caused confusion by stating her bed sores were back, but still wanted the foam mattress back at home (which will just make them worse). So planning for the future we have agreed they will look into getting the style of air mattress for mum at home, as the ones they use in the hospice. Another problem addressed, and hopefully sorted.

So after over an hour of talking we decided on the following.

Mum will try the art therapy classes and consider coming back weekly for them.
She will continue to come to the hospice for physio.
We will try her watching TV before she leaves the hospice, so she can regain confidence in watching it.
The plan is to have her home mid-end of next week.
That's cutting it all a bit short as I have just realised this is dragging on a bit, and I have another entry to write yet. So thank you for reading, and I hope this all made some sense.

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