Thursday, February 10, 2011

Rebellion or something else?

This afternoon we headed to St Christophers for a meeting with Karen, one of the care nurses. From the off mum was obstructive and not really willing to talk about anything. Still hell bent on this whole "blood too thick" situation that she has been focusing on, which has been rejected a number of times now.

As Karen tried to work through the various problems mum described with her health, she dared to touch on anxiety. Big mistake! Just like with the doctor a few days ago she almost displayed disgust at the idea that she was in any way anxious or depressed with her situation, and insisted there was no point talking about it, or taking drugs. Instead it was something she needs to deal with herself, and not talk to people or groups about what she can do to help her cope.

After the session finished (somewhat early as mum was fed up and tired) I spoke to Karen in the hope she had seen the same as me. Mum stone walling anything offered or suggested to her. Massage, exercise groups, group discussions, medication etc, all very bad ideas in mums mind.

Problem is, this leaves me in a really awkward situation, of knowing mum is spiralling mentally, but not being able to do anything about it. Feeling a little powerless at this point to say the least, but trying to stay positive that I can do something at least. Hopefully the weather will be good to us over the coming days and I can get mum out a bit in the afternoons. Clear her mind a bit and let her unwind.

On a positive note, a new afternoon carer came today, prompt, efficient and mum seems happy with that. No hanging about, does what she needs to do and leaves. Which right now is what suits mum. She hates people hanging around for no reason at all. She says she will be back tomorrow, so I'm hoping this is a permanent fixture now. Now just the mornings to sort out. Mum said at the meeting today with Karen that the carer is MEANT to come at 7am. A little confusion maybe, or is mum trying to allow the current carer flexibility in order to keep her. Would be far easier if she just said " I want her to say ". Rather than having a go at all the other carers who come, about her timing, then being nice to the one in the wrong.

Phew, seems there are a few issues cropping up here again now, but all I can do is keep an eye on things, and try and get help when I can. Main concern now, mums mental state.
Regards
Michael

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